my first words

hello. it's almost 11.30pm on a fresh sunday night here in the eatern time zone. i just started this blog instead of reading whatever it is that i should be reading for tonight/tomorrow: to wit, THE FOLD: LEIBNIZ AND THE BAROQUE by gilles deleuze and EL ZORRO DE ARRIBA Y EL ZORRO DE ABAJO by josé maría arguedas. i tried to get through some of these earlier at a coffee shop, but i kept listening to this extremely angry boy two tables behind me. the girl accompanying him had just broken the bad news, and he took it poorly and loudly. it really didn't seem like the kind of conversation that should be going on in a public place. then i picked up on the chatterings of this attractive couple nearby. they sounded like they were speaking in spanish. i could not fully decipher what they went on about, though, and since their accent did not ring familiar, i thus concluded that they were not speaking spanish but, obviously, portuguese. which reminds me of one of the final scenes of LOVE ACTUALLY that i must admit that i watched the other afternoon with my roommate, alan. he cooked some pasta and i cooked some pizza in our little italian kitchen while i couldn't help but get sucked into that sweet black hole. plus, mom got the soundtrack a few christmases ago and watching the movie made me think of listening to that kelly clarkson song in the glory days of the hemi-powered durango (wadup, curtis!) as we drove around suburban kc in the snow. after i told alan about my memories, we both agreed that kelly clarkson comes off as being "totally down-to-earth." i watch lots of television these days--we've got hundreds of channels at my house. i felt like old dad today when i caught almost the entire final round of the masters while i ate popcorn popped on the stove and drank a wild cherry pepsi. i even took a little nap on the couch. unlike, dad, however, i did not snore. now i will see if i can find some sleep on a sunday night--a rarity these weeks. yet, before, i'll try and think through the "crepuscularity of being" that i plan to write a bit about for a paper. of course, i'll also wash my face with my dermatologist-recommended soap. you wouldn't believe the amount of anxious time i spent in front of the facial cleanser section today at the grocery store, though. i thought i could feel my face exploding as i failed to locate the liquid PURPOSE soap and had to settle for the NEUTRAGENA. i've always thought that the following sentence could be seen as a valid avatar of the bourgeosie boy: "no, sorry, but i can't make it to lunch today. i have an appointment with my dermatologist."